Bumps in the road - or potholes!

I think that, no matter who we are, or what we’re up to, we experience times when the road is not so smooth and easy. What I’ve noticed is that we can either experience those times as bumps in the road, potholes, or even a dead end.
I hit some potholes this last week. When I look at my circumstances, nothing was different. But I saw things as going from bad to worse – quickly; just about time to panic; call 911; run for cover!
Now that I have regained my footing I can look at that experience and create a roadmap for getting back on track. When things were not going so well in some areas of my life, rather than fully accepting what I saw, I created a little fantasy in my head. I can totally understand why – it felt better in the moment. I believe it was the Dalai Lama who suggested three options in any situation:
1. Completely accept things as they are. This means that they are no longer an issue, problem or cause for concern.
2. Try to change them in any way you can.
3. Leave the situation.
I think the first actually leads to the second in that, unless you can completely be okay with what is happening in the moment, (I mean, really, what choice do you have? It’s already happening. No way to turn back the hands of time and undo it.) we can’t begin to find ways to make things better.
Well, my fantasizing was more like denial than acceptance so things got worse. Go figure! Sometimes it’s the 2x4 up the side of the head that’s required to get us to accept what is.
To change involves, first and foremost, a mental shift. Allowing options to reveal themselves to you through a softening of perspective. You move from ‘either/or’ to seeing an array of possibilities from which to choose. The relief that was created by my fully accepting things as they are – not my fantasizing - gave me a moment of openness. Through that openness I saw that:
1. I was not alone. So I began to reach out to others asking for help, support or advice. Not easy for someone who wants others to see herself as having it all together!
2. I had created this so I can un-create it. So I began to create scenarios in my head of how things could be better.
3. I have really no idea what is best for me.
4. I need a broader perspective – one that can only be obtained through quiet, meditation, contemplation, going within – to the eye of the storm.
For me, nothing externally has really changed but my experience of life in this moment is one with very gentle bumps, if any, in the road I am travelling. Of course, all that, too can – and will - change. That’s the fun of travelling down this road!